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Submitted on
March 13, 2012
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I know that sinking feeling,
as I've been here all before.
I've sat in every empty room,
I've walked this cold, hard floor.

What is it I've forgotten?
I had it moments ago, but where?
I see something in a cracked mirror,
I turn, but nothing's there.

I am drowning in the grey fog,
I find this quite distressing.
I cannot see through confusion's shroud,
that is made from second guessing.

Down this spiral staircase I fall,
there is a black hole at the end.
I'm trapped inside it, my mind in ruins,
I cannot see what I could mend.

At first I was so self assured,
then something snapped and the light went out.
I cannot see anything any more,
my ship is sinking in a sea of doubt.
I wrote this as a story/introduction for a dance based on doubt that I am choreographing with two friends. I wrote this quite late at night, so I drew deeply on darkness and swirly feelings... If you catch my drift!
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:iconshehrozeameen:
shehrozeameen Dec 2, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
I like the idea of this poem. Because of its innocent portrayal of doubt - I say innocent because it is clear that the protagonist has not been particularly doubtful before, and hence its their first time - it delivers on the point about doubt well. And that makes it a well written poem. The use of rhyming is well kept too. I certainly liked it :meow:
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:iconmissellaallanpoe:
MissEllaAllanPoe Dec 19, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Well thank you! I wanted to explore how it felt to truly doubt yourself, which is probably where the innocence comes in, as I haven't really doubted myself to such an extent... I suppose I'm lucky that way... I'm glad you liked it!
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:iconshehrozeameen:
shehrozeameen Dec 19, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
I did :) Beyond any doubts :aww:
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:iconmissellaallanpoe:
MissEllaAllanPoe Dec 21, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Yay! :) xxxx
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:iconshehrozeameen:
shehrozeameen Dec 22, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
:) Note me some of your works, I'm in need of literature to read.
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:iconmissellaallanpoe:
MissEllaAllanPoe Dec 23, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
I have to admit, I've still not got to grips with the whole "noting" thing so whilst I do, just browse through my gallery; I have only two or three stories (I think) so they won't be hard to find! ... I really need to start writing more!
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:iconshehrozeameen:
shehrozeameen Dec 23, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
:) You should.

I'll send you a note sometime soon, so hopefully you'll have something to read ;)
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:iconmissellaallanpoe:
MissEllaAllanPoe Dec 29, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Thanks!
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:iconmistress-macabre:
mistress-macabre Jul 6, 2012  Hobbyist Photographer
Beautiful.
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:iconmissellaallanpoe:
MissEllaAllanPoe Jul 24, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you very much.
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